Lost

Never have I been claustrophobic
Yet I feel it closing in.
I have feared very little in life,
And now anxiety is my constant partner.
Lost I have not,
But lost I am.

I reach out and touch,
Still I feel not what I am touching.
Brave and fearless is the warrior,
Although within the child weeps
I fear not the darkness,
For it surrounds and comforts me.

I hear the voices of children singing,
And it sounds of pure sweet innocence.
Intolerable fear, panic, insecurity, abandonment.
I grope and gasp for my next breath.
Stop!

I close my eyes,
And the darkness surrounds me once more.
Breathe deep one more time,
Slowly with much control.
Exhale.

Feel the rush that is life.
Breathe in again,
Deeper and slower.
I open my eyes to see you.
Are you real or a vision in my mind?

I reach out and touch,
And I feel you reaching out and touching me.
Life goes on,
With you by my side.
I am not lost,
I have been found by you.

 

© 2003 Alden L. Doane